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Question:
Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Response:
Many individuals argue that the most urgent environmental issue of our time is the loss of specific animal and plants species. Other believe there are more critical environmental issues, including climate. Personally, I believe protecting particular animal and plant species should be considered more urgent issue. Those who argue that loss of particular species of plants and animals is our main environmental problem believe it can have negative lon-term impact on human. Humans rely heavily on plants and animals for their survival. Human provide our food from natural resources and animals. Each species of animals and plants plays a crucial role in food chain. For instance, bees are essential part of food chain dut to pollination, if they becom extinct, whole ecosystem will be distrupt. Therefore, the extinction of specific animal or plant species can threat human life. Others believe we should focus on more serious environmental problems, including climate change or air and water pollution. These problems already have threatend our life and earth, as they damage environment in irreversibel manner. They lead to rising water levels, damaging ozone layer. They aslo harm human health by making air and soil polluted, which not only decrease the qaulity of like but also cause long-term negative effects on our health. However, we can tackle these issue and simulantely consider loss of particular species of animals or plants. In conclusion, although environmental problems, including climate change and air pollution require immediate actions, we must protect rare animal or plant species to avoid extinction.
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Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
Many individuals argue that the most urgent environmental issue of our time is the loss of specific animal and plantsplant species. OtherOthers believe there are more critical environmental issues, including climate change. Personally, I believe protecting particular animal and plant species should be considered a more urgent issue. Those who argue that the loss of particular species of plants and animals is our main environmental problem believe it can have a negative lonlong-term impact on humanhumans. Humans rely heavily on plants and animals for their survival. Human provideWe obtain our food from natural resources and animals. Each species of animalsanimal and plantsplant plays a crucial role in the food chain. For instance, bees are an essential part of the food chain dutdue to pollination,; if they becombecome extinct, the whole ecosystem will be distruptdisrupted. Therefore, the extinction of specific animal or plant species can threatthreaten human life. Others believe we should focus on more serious environmental problems, including climate change or air and water pollution. These problems have already have threatend threatened our lifelives and earththe Earth, as they damage the environment in irreversibelan irreversible manner. They lead to rising water levels, damaging and damage the ozone layer. They asloalso harm human health by makingpolluting the air and soil polluted, which not only decreasedecreases the qaulityquality of likelife but also causecauses long-term negative effects on our health. However, we can tackle these issueissues and simulantelysimultaneously consider the loss of particular species of animals or plants. In conclusion, although environmental problems, including climate change and air pollution, require immediate actionsaction, we must protect rare animal or plant species to avoid extinction.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
Many individuals argue that the most urgent environmental issue of our time is the loss of specific animal and plants species. Other believe there are more critical environmental issues, including climate. Personally, I believe protecting particular animal and plant species should be considered more urgent issue.
Many individuals argue that the most urgent environmental issue of our time is the loss of specific animal and plant species. Others believe there are more critical environmental issues, such as climate change. Personally, I believe protecting particular animal and plant species should be considered a more urgent issue.
Those who argue that loss of particular species of plants and animals is our main environmental problem believe it can have negative lon-term impact on human. Humans rely heavily on plants and animals for their survival. Human provide our food from natural resources and animals. Each species of animals and plants plays a crucial role in food chain. For instance, bees are essential part of food chain dut to pollination, if they becom extinct, whole ecosystem will be distrupt. Therefore, the extinction of specific animal or plant species can threat human life.
Those who argue that the loss of particular species is our main environmental problem believe it can have long-term negative impacts on humans. Humans rely heavily on plants and animals for survival, as they provide essential resources such as food. Each species plays a crucial role in the food chain. For instance, bees are vital for pollination; if they become extinct, entire ecosystems will be disrupted. Therefore, the extinction of specific species can threaten human life.
Others believe we should focus on more serious environmental problems, including climate change or air and water pollution. These problems already have threatend our life and earth, as they damage environment in irreversibel manner. They lead to rising water levels, damaging ozone layer. They aslo harm human health by making air and soil polluted, which not only decrease the qaulity of like but also cause long-term negative effects on our health. However, we can tackle these issue and simulantely consider loss of particular species of animals or plants.
Others argue that we should prioritize more pressing environmental problems, such as climate change or air and water pollution. These issues already endanger both human life and the planet, causing irreversible damage. They contribute to rising sea levels, ozone layer depletion, and pollution of air and soil, which not only reduce quality of life but also have long-term health consequences. However, we can address these challenges while simultaneously working to prevent the loss of endangered species.
In conclusion, although environmental problems, including climate change and air pollution require immediate actions, we must protect rare animal or plant species to avoid extinction.
In conclusion, although climate change and pollution require immediate action, protecting rare animal and plant species from extinction must also be a priority.
Band Score: 6

Feedback on Your Essay

Task Achievement

  • Your essay addresses both views and provides a clear opinion, which meets the task requirements. However, the argument could be more balanced. The second view (climate change and pollution) is somewhat underdeveloped compared to the first view (loss of species).
  • Some points lack clarity due to grammatical errors (e.g., "negative lon-term impact," "if they becom extinct," "irreversibel manner"). These affect the coherence of your argument.
  • The conclusion is present but could be more nuanced—acknowledging the importance of both issues while reinforcing your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion

  • The essay has a logical structure, but some transitions between ideas are abrupt. For example, the shift from discussing species loss to climate change could be smoother.
  • Repetition occurs in some places (e.g., "animal and plants species" is mentioned multiple times without variation).
  • Some sentences are awkwardly phrased, making the flow less natural (e.g., "Human provide our food from natural resources and animals").

Lexical Resource

  • There are several spelling and word choice errors ("dut" instead of "due," "qaulity of like" instead of "quality of life," "simulantely" instead of "simultaneously"). These reduce clarity.
  • Some vocabulary is repetitive (e.g., "particular species" is used frequently). More varied synonyms (e.g., "endangered wildlife," "biodiversity loss") would improve lexical range.
  • Some phrases are unnatural (e.g., "damaging ozone layer" should be "damage to the ozone layer").

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

  • There are multiple grammatical errors:
    • Subject-verb agreement issues ("Human provide" → "Humans provide").
    • Incorrect verb forms ("if they becom extinct" → "if they become extinct").
    • Missing articles ("damaging ozone layer" → "damaging the ozone layer").
    • Sentence fragments ("They aslo harm human health by making air and soil polluted, which not only decrease the qaulity of like but also cause long-term negative effects on our health.")
  • More complex sentence structures (e.g., conditional sentences, relative clauses) would improve the grammatical range.

Suggestions for Improvement

  1. Balance the Discussion – Give equal depth to both views before stating your opinion.
  2. Proofread for Errors – Correct spelling, grammar, and word choice to improve clarity.
  3. Use Synonyms & Varied Structures – Avoid repetition and include more complex sentences.
  4. Strengthen the Conclusion – Summarize both sides more clearly before reinforcing your stance.

With these adjustments, your essay will be more coherent, accurate, and persuasive. Keep practicing!

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