Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which cause many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Response:
There is some truth in the argument that food and drinks which are not made in the house are rich in sugar, and they can have impacts on people's health. So, increase in their profit can be helpful to lessen their consumption because of reducing the risk of sugar related disease and encouraging people to use healthy products instead, while sugar's important role in body should not be forgotten.
On the one hand increasing the fee of sugary items may contribute to less consumption of it which lowers the risks of disorders like obesity and diabetes. Although these diseases are not curable, they can be controlled by using less sugar in everyday meals. However, some people do not take obesity and diabetes serious at first, they can decrease the quality of lives as the time passes. An obese man who suffers from diabetes by taking less sugar in his diet not only will have been able to enjoy his body shape in his next 10 years but also will be using less medications.
It is important to note that increasing the cost of sugar would be useful since it encourages people to take other substances instead which have more healthier ingredients. Products with high amount of protein and vitamins instead of sugar can help build muscles can lead to a healthier lifestyle. Consuming vegetables and fruits and eggs would be a complete meal instead of using poor nutrition with higher profit.
On the other hand eating less sugar because of the rise in its cost would cause problems for the brain's function which is first due to use glucose. Without adequate amount of sugar in body people would experience mental disorders like, cognitive problems, memory loss. Regulations are needed for the utilization of sugar rather than just rising its costs.
In conclusion, products having high amount of sugar should be bought less due to increase in its profit to reduce the risk of obesity and diabetes, and other high nutrition products replaced in peoples diet. In my opinion, the importance of sugar for the brain function should not be ignored. However, consuming sugar with limitations by increasing its cost would benefit not only the physical health but also the mental efficacy.
Marking your essay. This might take a few minutes.
Click on red question marks (?) to see an explanation for each change. Some changes are only suggestions and don't mean the original is necessarily wrong.
This section presents vocabulary suggestions. Highlighted words are either too simple or are repeated more than 3 times . Please note that some suggested alternatives might require changes to other parts of the sentence.
This section presents a professionally wirtten variation of your essay and highlights the differences.
There is some truth in the argument that food and drinks which are not made in the house are rich in sugar, and they can have impacts on people's health. So, increase in their profit can be helpful to lessen their consumption because of reducing the risk of sugar related disease and encouraging people to use healthy products instead, while sugar's important role in body should not be forgotten.
On the one hand increasing the fee of sugary items may contribute to less consumption of it which lowers the risks of disorders like obesity and diabetes. Although these diseases are not curable, they can be controlled by using less sugar in everyday meals. However, some people do not take obesity and diabetes serious at first, they can decrease the quality of lives as the time passes. An obese man who suffers from diabetes by taking less sugar in his diet not only will have been able to enjoy his body shape in his next 10 years but also will be using less medications.
It is important to note that increasing the cost of sugar would be useful since it encourages people to take other substances instead which have more healthier ingredients. Products with high amount of protein and vitamins instead of sugar can help build muscles can lead to a healthier lifestyle. Consuming vegetables and fruits and eggs would be a complete meal instead of using poor nutrition with higher profit.
On the other hand eating less sugar because of the rise in its cost would cause problems for the brain's function which is first due to use glucose. Without adequate amount of sugar in body people would experience mental disorders like, cognitive problems, memory loss. Regulations are needed for the utilization of sugar rather than just rising its costs.
In conclusion, products having high amount of sugar should be bought less due to increase in its profit to reduce the risk of obesity and diabetes, and other high nutrition products replaced in peoples diet. In my opinion, the importance of sugar for the brain function should not be ignored. However, consuming sugar with limitations by increasing its cost would benefit not only the physical health but also the mental efficacy.